Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby ...somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "normal" is history.
Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct...somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.
Somebody said being a mother is boring...somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.
Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will "turn out good"...somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.
Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices...somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor's kitchen window.
Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother...somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math.
Somebody said you can't love the fifth child as much as you love the first...somebody doesn't have five children.
Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books...somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his ears.
Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery...somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten
or on a plane headed for military "boot camp."
Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back...somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.
Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married...somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings.
Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home...somebody never had grandchildren.
Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her...somebody ISN'T A MOTHER!